|
|
Post by loves2shop4shoes on May 23, 2017 19:01:30 GMT
So... in full transparency, I've been lurking all of the other sub boards.
I personally would not choose to post on a site run by McBenny. Some of the things she said when she got heated were not things I want to associate myself with. There is drama, and then there is downright abuse, and I personally feel that she became abusive. And believe me, if I wanted abuse for no reason, I'd call my mother.
That being said, if the board is run by someone else, and you all want to move, I'll move with you.
I think the philosophy of the mods on this board so far has been "Wait and see what's going on, and then if we need to step it up to make this place permanently 'home', we will." I'm the techy person in charge, so I can work on adding quick tags and things of the sort. I'm just not going to invest the time if this is a placeholder.
If full FULL transparency, I've discussed with the other admins, the possibility of making this site more IF friendly (ie. changing names, etc.) in case the IF folks need a non-dramatic place to land and cannot find one that's suitable. I have close friends whose lives were changed by the IF board, and I don't want to see them get shafted.
Moral of the story... I too am waiting to see how things shake up. If this board becomes a long term plan for folks, I'm happy to put in the effort to make it look and function less like a template site. If this is a placeholder board for a week, I have better things to invest my time in.
|
|
|
|
Post by winegirl9 on May 23, 2017 19:17:09 GMT
Voting - ✅
|
|
|
|
Post by oldbaylover1024 on May 23, 2017 19:37:09 GMT
monicageller - So long story short, there was an IF mod that was de-modded a while back and the details were very unclear to the community (which went against the whole premise of TCF). The admins basically just got rid of her and never explained why. She was a beloved member of the IF/loss community. When all this shit went down, the reason for her de-mod came to light and it basically boiled down to lies told by Na.ria.
Now I can tell you that this is a BIG DEAL to the IF/loss community. We were basically banned by TB years ago. I was blocked by TB for asking a noob to remove her positive peestick from the TTCAL board (that was a basic and well-known no-no). So the move to TCF was a very personal, very sensitive decision for us. We moved as a community and helped grow TCF as a community. For a lot of IF/loss members, seeing Na.ria's receipts was bullshit. Lies were told and friends were hurt IRL. It was not okay.
wineandcupcakes can tell you more, but I think that sums it up. Wineandcupcakes - correct ANY of that in case I messed up my summary.
Regarding moving to a board by Mc.Benny... well, I never really participated in Parenting, so my loyalties don't lie with any of the Parenting regs honestly. I'm more interested in moving where my loss ladies go - I've been with them since 2011 and they got me through some of my darkest days. And I trust them to run a forum.
Obviously, I'll continue to check in with you guys regardless of where we end up. You helped me through my pregnancy with C after my losses and through his NICU stay. That means a lot.
ETA: I can see why the loss/IF/de-mod situation isn't relevant to everyone, so my feelings aren't hurt if you frankly don't give a shit LOL A lot of the other BS in those long threads didn't mean anything to me. |
|
|
|
Post by evelyn333 on May 23, 2017 19:39:20 GMT
+whatever to stay put until things are more settled. oldbaylover1024 can you fill me in on what went down btwn Naria and the loss/IF community? I've tried to keep up with everything that happened, but this portion of it I missed. Ya I didn't keep up on it either and was curious to know |
|
|
|
Post by sweetieheart on May 23, 2017 20:07:37 GMT
I'm in the wait and see category. Honestly, I would really like this board to be permanent and hopefully develop into something waaay less drama filled than the parenting board. Maybe that's too much to ask. I know people have disagreements, but the flame-away attitude of the ones making waves is nms. Also, I don't want to have to move again in however many months because the same people always blowing shit up.
|
|
|
|
Post by flyinghorses6 on May 23, 2017 20:18:54 GMT
I literally have no input about the boards/mods/parenting etc. I am no longer reading or lurking or posting anywhere but my BMBs. I just don't have time to keep up with drama that has basically nothing to do with me. I spent far too much time last week reading and investing my time figuring out what the hell was going on. Over it. Totally. I'm on two separate boards because that's where my BMBs are. It doesn't bother me.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
|
|
|
|
Post by musicallyinclined on May 23, 2017 20:21:53 GMT
On a completely unrelated note, how many cups of coffee is too many?
|
|
|
|
Post by oldbaylover1024 on May 23, 2017 20:31:15 GMT
On a completely unrelated note, how many cups of coffee is too many? That's a trick question. I cannot have too much coffee.
|
|
|
|
Post by musicallyinclined on May 23, 2017 21:01:15 GMT
oldbaylover1024 , that's pretty much what I was thinking. I'm only on number 4, thinking maybe one more... ETA: 
|
|
|
|
Post by wineandcupcakes on May 23, 2017 21:03:51 GMT
oldbaylover1024 and loves2shop4shoes basically have it right. Except when all of this went down on the IF boards, instead of throwing an epic temper tantrum and making everyone move away from TCF, everyone quietly went to a FB group that had been established for a while. Also, parenting lashed out at us and called us ridiculous over the whole thing, yet now they used our experience as their #1 reason for the move 🙄 I can only speak to my end of things. I have never, ever told anyone on this forum to fuck off until McBenny said things that were SO out of line about the loss community. While myself, someone else and O2 girl made logical arguments about why what she said was hurtful, her only responses were "fuck yourself in the ass with a sick dick" "fuck yourself sideways" "a couple of organisms will put you to sleep" "fuck yourself with a cauliflower dick" literally for pages. How do you respond to that trash? It made me, and MANY others question her stability. I then went on to read how she behaved in other threads and its clear she has issues. I don't trust her, or anyone close with her, with personal info such as IP addresses so I won't go to any board where McBenny, FrankenBoom or HilarityEnsued are the HBIC (and HE is one of only two people in the running for the position). In addition, the 3 of us who stuck up for IF/loss were told that we were over the line and bullying McBenny - and we were acting the SAME WAY they act all day every day to everyone. Its hypocritical. Also, somehow, we were supposed to know that there was something going on in McBs personal life and for that reason, we should back off, yet nobody was doing the same for Naria? Not for anything, some of the things she did were shady as hell, but the poor woman is sick and pregnant, and while I understand that everyone didn't give a crap about that because she's "running a business," we don't pay to use her forum so it's no skin off our nose. Especially because parenting wanted so badly to have more members but 98% of people are too afraid to jump in there because they are, quite frankly, mean bullies for the most part. Many are nice and normal, but some of the women on there are just hateful and horrible. Anyways, don't want to bring the drama here, so that's all I'll say about that.
|
|
|
|
Post by flyinghorses6 on May 23, 2017 22:58:36 GMT
wineandcupcakes I tend to feel like they are bullies too. And I think it's sad that people are drawn to them. They are definitely the most popular posters. And people either are afraid to be called out by them, or obsessed with sucking up to them. I have lurked Parenting for some time; but they are a huge reason I have never put the effort in to establish myself there. I guess I just don't understand being mean to just be mean. If you disagree with someone you can do so respectfully. I guess I also should mention that I hate FFFC and UO on parenting because it is just fuel to the "mean girl" fire. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
|
|
|
|
Post by shellbell on May 23, 2017 23:20:32 GMT
oldbaylover1024 I'm hours behind but... "A preschooler that voluntarily cleaned the bathroom today?" Teach me.
|
|
|
|
Post by shellbell on May 23, 2017 23:24:39 GMT
What is SAIF?
|
|
|
|
Post by shellbell on May 23, 2017 23:27:25 GMT
I went back to work today! I'm thankful for such cool colleagues and students. I'm also thankful my mom has committed to watching DD so she doesn't have to start dc yet.
That said, DD had a pretty rough day and my mom had to ask DH to come home. DD was fighting the bottle for 2 hours, and my mom thought DH would be more successful. She took the first bottle fine. I hope it gets better.
|
|
|
|
Post by sweetieheart on May 24, 2017 0:18:20 GMT
|
|
